TO SHARE AND NOT TO SHARE – Relationships

You find the perfect companion, friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife;  you like the same things, you love the same places, you complement each other in pretty much everything, you share the same ideals and goals and you feel like there’s nothing you can’t hold back or nothing you can’t share.

Isn’t it wonderful to be able to be your full self and feel like your worst self is as much loved as your best?

SHARING IS KEY TO HAPPINESS

As our lives go on at a fast pace, we face successes, defeats, joy, pain, love and struggle.

We can proudly go through all these phases alone however, as human beings our natural need is to SHARE OUR FEELINGS WITH SOMEONE, whether it is our best friend, an occasional friend or a companion.

It is common nowadays that REAL CONTACTS are being substituted (or confused) with SOCIAL MEDIA CONTACTS, which still proves that we look for fulfillment by letting our thoughts, opinions, dissent, adoration or a story, OUT.

I strongly believe however, that real people are the ones who can fully and consistently give us 100% satisfaction.

Think about it, you may suddenly obtain a life changing promotion or  have your biggest dream come true or become a millionaire! Aren’t you happier when your share your conquests with someone close? I BELIEVE YOU ARE.

ALSO: we are ALL strong when we feel good but when we are sick and weak,  don’t we feel less lonely having a loved one taking care of us? I KNOW WE ARE.

BUT CAN WE ALWAYS SHARE EVERYTHING? THE REVERSE SIDE OF THE MEDAL

Take couples for example. And take for instance their inevitable conversations about EACH OTHER PAST RELATIONSHIPS; whether it is to express complaint or to happily comparing it with their new and much better fit, sharing the topic occurs naturally.

It helps them understanding “where they come from”, besides knowing each other better. Nothing wrong with that, right?

UNTIL YOU SHARE THE WRONG INFORMATION

With the “wrong” partner. Where by “wrong” I mean someone whom is not ready or capable to TAKE the information you are sharing, the right way.

Knowing (and respecting) your partner’s limitations  helps avoiding the following mistake but we don’t always see the red flags, until we test it…

Some subjects like “how many relationships – or flirts – have you been into” or “sex” are very delicate and even the strongest, self-confident, open minded, “loving everything about you” companion, may be affected by “the knowledge” of it…negatively, trust me.

I’ve once had the splendid idea of satisfying my ex boyfriend’s curiosity concerning some of my sexual experiences. Although I was reluctant at first, he insisted in wanting to know so I felt assured that nothing I was about to say, could have possibly become a treat.

I WAS WRONG! HERE’S WHY

He immediately questioned our relationship, possibly himself and definitely ME. No matter how many words of reassurance, flatter and love I spoke, all of it just bounced back unheard.

Now…besides the fact that we should know ourselves well enough NOT TO ASK QUESTIONS IF WE CAN’T DEAL WITH THE ANSWERS, we also need to be mature enough to understand that not everything needs to be shared; especially sensitive matters with high potential of provoking useless jealousy and unnecessary heartbreaks.

After all, we did break up with our previous partner for a reason or two right? But even this evidence won’t be enough for a quick recover, IF there will be a recover…

NOT SHARING SENSITIVE INFORMATION DOESN’T MEAN YOU ARE NOT BEING TRUTHFUL TO YOUR PARTNER.

Think about this: you don’t share your private business while you are using the bathroom right? For Pete’s sake if you do, just be aware that it may kill your sex appeal!

So…assuming you DON’T, that doesn’t mean you are hiding, or keeping from. You are just being…PRIVATE, for the obvious sake of both.

Unless we’re hiding a nest of snakes, we all have a locked drawer in our closet, which privacy shall be mutually respected, if we want a longstanding relationship.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? Share your experiences with me in the comment section?

 

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